OK, so I kinda hate Audioslave

Preface: This post is pretty random and basically an excuse for me to vent because Ghosts ‘n fucking Goblins for the NES is kicking my ass and the anger has to be channeled somewhere. It is also the kind of post I’ve tried to steer clear of ever since I started blogging again a few months ago. But I just can’t resist ranting this once. Consider it a warm-up for what will hopefully be a series of much more interesting posts in the near future.

Actual rant begins now:

So I am in this music store, minding my own business, with a copy of the splendid rerelease of Pacific Ocean Blue in hand, when I catch a glimpse of Revelations, the third and, thankfully, final album by Audioslave. Now the cd was just sitting in the discount shelf, among countless other cds. It wasn’t prominently displayed or anything, so I shouldn’t even have noticed it, right? Wrong. I wish I could say I hate the group – that would justify the frustration I felt as soon as I laid my eyes on that album cover – but the truth is I’m so indifferent to their music that such strong feelings are simply not present.

There are, however, a couple of things I hate about Audioslave and these are Chris Cornell’s voice and the fact that they cover Rage Against the Machine songs with vocals by the aforementioned singer.

Hello, I’m Chris Cornell and the editor of this blog doesn’t approve of my singing.

Allow me a brief flashback. It’s late 2002, I think, and Audioslave’s eponymous album is out. Being a big RATM fan, I buy it, listen to it, then wait for the next one, since it is obvious to me that the different styles of music that each part of the group represents don’t match that nicely.

Three parts RATM and one part Chris Cornell, who I must admit was completely new to me back then, Audioslave sounded awkward in their first album. They continued along the same path in their second one, which was the final one I purchased, hoping for a tighter, less boring sound. I never got the third one, so you can probably tell how that turned out.

Surprisingly – or, come to think of it, not so surprisingly – their albums sold lots of copies, they were awarded some Grammy awards, whatever that means, and even became the first American rock band to perform an open-air concert in Cuba, which must’ve been sad and disappointing for Cubans waiting for some ‘merican rock music after all those years. Serves them right, I guess.

So, anyway, Audioslave disbanded in 2007 or something, a day that must surely have been a joyful one in my life, but just can’t quite remember because I didn’t really give a crap by that time. The only memory I have of Audioslave is Chris Cornell’s annoying, raspy voice and his shitty cover of a RATM song (or maybe it was two; the pain is too much to handle, I can’t remember clearly).

I haven’t listened to anything by Soundgarden, or any of CC’s solo work – and I sure as hell won’t after Audioslave – but his voice causes my ears to bleed and my heart to race in fear. Allright, so it might not cause panic, but I still don’t like it. What made RATM function so well, apart from their strong political message, was the quality of their music. Rap and rock fused in an awesome, explosive sound that wasn’t just unique, but in a way also representative of the message.

Audioslave was a mixture of RATM, this time with a more classic rock feel, and whatever Cornell was doing in the 80s and 90s, I suppose. It also lacked a direction. Vaguely political lyrics mixed with pretty standard rock lyrics, all of it sung irritantingly by Chris. An obvious attempt to appeal to both RATM and Soundgarden/Cornell fans and, as is usually the case with “super groups”, lots of generic music with nothing to distinguish it from other mediocre groups other than its members.

But I’ve said enough. Now is the time for a comparison. Below is a video of Audioslave covering Killing in the Name, a standard RATM number:

And here’s the original:

See what I mean? No? Well, that’s OK, this comparison is kind of meaningless, anyway.

I’m starting to run out of fuel, but I will say this before I post this rambling piece of data: Their instrumental RATM covers are very interesting, especially when there’s a new solo involved.

Note: Strictly personal opinion, certainly misinformed, meant to be only slightly offensive, please don’t sue, but feel free to Martha. Comment if you will, just don’t expect me to like Audioslave.